Round Two

Second Meeting With Alya:

I am not really a fan of Mondays. They come right after the weekend and on top of that are my longest days. But the past two Mondays have been better than normal because I have been able to meet with Alya. It is such a treat getting to meet with someone who has been to Saudi and knows what it is like. She is the only other person I know, besides my parents, who has been there. We are able to talk about experiences we have had without having to describe what something is, so the conversations are much more free flowing compared to just questions and answers. It really is great! I try to talk to my friends about the weather in Saudi, but if you have never lived through that summer you can’t really feel the heat. Alya knows and can relate to those horrendous months.

We began our conversation right where we left off last time or how two friends would begin. She told me about the busy weekend she had about going to Dallas three times! Apparently she has a friend there who she enjoys spending time with. Also, there are parks there that her kids can run around in and play. She says that she loves how America is so friendly to kids! Her husband wants to tire the kids out before they go to a restaurant-which they always do in Dallas.

Along that same note, Alya talks to me in way as if I am in on the joke when describing her culture and their customs. Not to mean that her culture or customs are a joke by any means, I just don’t know how to explain it in another manner. Some of the stories or examples she describes to me make me feel like I am in on her culture. For instance, today she was talking about a friend of hers who did not understand Arab food traditions. In Saudi, and other Arab nations, the host provides many courses of food whenever someone comes over. If you were coming for tea, it would include about 8 different food courses along with the tea. Alya told me about how her friend kept saying she was full and did not want to eat anymore, but Alya kept giving her food. Her friend finally insisted on not eating more and pushed her plate away. Alya laughed and said that Arabs have to keep giving food and giving food even when people say no. It was funny for me to hear this because she is very right! All of the times I have had meals with Arab families they serve so much food and keep putting it on my plate even when I do not want to eat anymore. It is just a completely different culture from ours here in America.

Papers. The dread of every college student. That goes for Alya too! She had a paper due today that was all about references. She told me that she is not proud of her English speaking, but writing and grammar comes more naturally to her. Even with the self esteem builder of liking her writing she was really nervous to turn in her essay. It is comforting to see how similar all people are regardless of their background. Turning in research papers still makes people queasy.

Today, Alya shared a few personal things with me regarding her family. She said that her children do not have many friends to play with outside of school. I was shocked to hear this because I could not imagine not playing with other children on the weekends or after school. But she told me that she lives in apartments off campus that are mostly for students, and none of them have children so there was no way for her children to play with other kids. I mentioned sleepovers with kids from school and she looked confused. She admitted that she did not know that word, and looked a little embarrassed to admit that. I tried to reassure her that it was completely all right if she didn’t one word, and explained what I meant. As I tried my best to explain what I was talking about she told me that they do not have those in Saudi! I was shocked! No sleepovers? I think of this as a right of passage for children-spending their first night away from mom and dad or grandparents. She asked several more questions on this topic and said that she would give it a try with her child’s friend from school. I was so happy that I was able to share something with her that might be able to help her kids. 

My meetings with Alya continue to be a blast! I am so excited that she is my conversation partner and feel like we never have enough time to talk before one of us has to leave. There are so many things I want to know about her experiences and so many things I want to ask about being a woman in Saudi, especially now that she has experienced the freedoms of America.